@ Words Hurt ...

Words Hurt … use them carefully

Bottom Line

• Words can hurt others' feelings … it is important to 'think before speaking'
• Ask yourself “can what I am about to say be misinterpreted” - if so, reconsider
• Never attack or make fun of a person or their behavior
• Whenever possible speak positively without criticism - even in a joke

In our everyday conversations, we may inadvertently use words or phrases that can make others uncomfortable. Here are some simple everyday statements:

“I don’t like that” … may mean - you're dumb to think that!

“Do it this way” … may mean - you are doing it wrong, don’t you know better?

“Don’t do it that way” … I’m smarter than you, so let me tell you how it’s done

“No” … I’m not interested, you’re wrong

We should look at communication as more than just telling, but 1) providing information and data and 2) changing behavior to encourage the other person to change or continue what they are doing.

Consider these examples when communicating:

Change “You should” to “here’s is how we found it to be easier to …”

Change “In case you haven’t noticed” to “You probably already know …”

Change “I know” to “Yes, I think I remember seeing that done …”

Be mindful of the other person - what they know, who they know and what has been their reaction to past recommendations or suggestions.

Now ask yourself what phrases put you on the defensive and how would you have like that person to have said it differently?

Finally, never direct your response, suggestion or comment directly at the person’s action or themselves (unless it is a life-threatening situation), try to make it respectful and think about how you would like to the comment directed to you.